unmentionables

Hubby is out. He is having dinner with some woman from the Australian Embassy to talk about building services contracts, or something. At least, that's what he says. I think I believe him as he did not exactly leap out of the door with the wind up his tail when he left at six.

Went to an earthquake evening on Monday - very informative (but somewhat scary) talk given by seismic expert. I tried not to think flippant thoughts about whether he asks his girlfriend "Did the earth move for you?" when they have hanky panky. Not sure if he has time for a girlfriend or hanky panky, though, as he spends all his time travelling the globe in search of interesting seismic hotspots (worryingly, he says he spends quite a lot of time in Kathmandu).

Apparently Nepal is right on the boundary of a tectonic collision between the Indian subcontinent and the Eurasian plate. The collision is happening at the rate of three and a half centimetres per year, which is pretty nifty, in tectonic terms. Anyway, we're all doomed, although there's no telling when. There could be an earthquake tonight, or in one hundred years time.

After the talk Hubby got out the house plans, which show where the earthquake resistant walls are in the house. If the earthquake happens at night, then the kids should be okay, but Hubby and I will probably plummet to an early death.

I would usually seek consolation from scary earthquake facts in a little light shopping. However, we are on a shopping ban until after Disneyland Hong Kong at Easter. I can't even eat or drink my way to comfort as I'm back on the bikini diet (green day today - lots of pasta and salad but no chocolate or gin). I suppose I could console myself with a nice bit of raw carrot. I think there may even be some limp lettuce leaves at the bottom of the fridge somewhere. Oh how yummy.

Tomorrow night there is a wine and cheese and art thingy on camp. I have invited lots of people. Don't think many will turn up though. I don't have much faith in my ability to charismatically rally lots of people to a function. However, I will send another text to everyone and wait outside camp at seven and see just how much of a Norma no-mates I really am...

It's nearly nine now. Do you think Hubby is really talking building contracts at the Australian Embassy, or is he in a gimp mask having his buttocks thrashed by a woman dressed in a black bin bag?

Yeah, I think he's still talking work at dinner too.

If there had been any sauciness to attend to I think he would have put better underpants on this morning, but as it was it was an old pair with an unmentionable hole in (unmentionable - just realised what a wierd word that is - think I might start using it more often, as an adjective, where it makes no sense at all, but will be good to use instead of lying: eg.

Son: Was the assembly on recycling interesting, Mummy?

Me: It was unmentionably good, Son.

or maybe

Twin 1: What was I like when I was a baby, Mummy?

Me: You were a quite unmentionable baby. etc.) then I think he's probably not.

Right, I should probably go.

Do have an unmentionable day! xxx